Fifty-two!
How you?
Me? Just being true,
To myself, my friends, my family–especially the fam–who you
Tried really hard to skew
In my view.

Yeah, I’m still bitter, and always will be because of the lies you would spew
For decades beaucoup
Hoping, I assume, that I would believe them, too.

And for a while, I withdrew
from all those you claimed you knew
were a horrible, awful crew
and I believed you.

I. Believed. You.

But then? There was one clue
That all the info you fed me was actually untrue
And I had a breakthrough
When I finally bid you adieu
Making sure to give you an avenue
Down which you could keep relationships with your grand-issues.

Instead, you chose to discontinue.

No calls, no letters, no words. You just withdrew
From their lives. And even though, in the beginning, there was still a path through
Which you and me could have continued,
As soon as you threw
Away those little children who adored you
I was absolutely finished and knew
Deep down that any connection we had was now unglued.

And now, four years later plus two
I have no qualms that I flew.

Ever notice that when the adult child will choose
Not to have a relationship with Mom, people argue,
“But she’s your Ma, you only get one!” like that’s a piece of info you never knew.

They never take a moment to consider, “Wow, what could that mother do
to cause her daughter to commit familial seppuku?”

They never think, “Mommy! How could you
do that to your child who you value?”

Why is it always the responsibility of the child to continue
with a toxic parental relationship and not the responsibility of the parent to DIScontinue
the lies, the abuse, and instead pursue
therapy, healing, and follow through
with the work necessary to rescue
their crew?

I sit here, with a mountain lakeview,
thinking about fifty-two
and how different I am from when she was fifty-two.

I was twenty and knew
nothing of the future events soon to ensue.

The rearview
mirror of life can sometimes skew
the view, but it can also
give you the breakthrough
and help you undo…

You.